There are many things that people associate with the label sissy. Usually it's a very feminine man, perhaps even at the stage of being TG or at least starting on hormones. Sometimes sissies are pictured as frilly little girls in hyper-girly pink satin party dresses layered in endless bows, ribbon, and lace. Often times, sissies dream of being kept doing domestic duties or being degraded somehow. Sissies seem to really enjoy cock, to the point of either being gay or so girly that it just seems natural.
Looking at myself, I wouldn't say that I'm overtly feminine. I often wonder how much of my personality is real, and how much is learned. I definitely look back at my life, and realize that I was faking my masculinity (and masking my femininity) at times. Still, I don't feel like a complete girl, just like a feminine man, kind of a 50 / 50 split. So the question is, "Am I feminine?" and the answer is, "Yes...and no." Confusing, isn't it?
Do I want to be TG or on hormones or a full time crossdresser? Right now, I would have to say, no. I'm not too sure how much of this is completely real and how much is fantasy. All I know is that while I would love to toss out all my male clothing, and strut outside to the world and say, "Hey! This is the real me!" I think that it probably sounds better in fantasy than reality. I don't hate being a male, and I don't know if I'd want to give up everything related to my male life, although the thought is tantalizing. Right now this is a "Probably no, but then again, full time crossdressing does sound exciting..."
Frilly Dresses - Although I have an intense fantasy of being feminized as a youth - and I even went out and bought some of the sissy dresses, panties and nighties - I'm going to have to say, that being a satin sissy really isn't my thing. I have a babydoll chiffon-over-satin dress that I wear as a nightgown that I enjoy, and I have a satin nightie that I like, and the frilly panties can be fun and different, but when it comes down to it, most of the time I just prefer to dress as a woman.
Domestic Duties - Once again, I often have a fantasy of being made to clean, and have even pretended that my wife has commanded me to do the dishes or some similar task. At first, it's sexy - maybe for about five minutes - but after that, it just becomes work. I get wet, dirty, sometimes sweaty, and I think about how much easier this would all be in regular clothes. Besides that, I'm kind of lazy, and prefer to be in my own world instead of servitude. For this, I'd say maybe if I got into the habit, it would be fulfilling, but I'm on the fence with this one too.
Cock - You know if you would have asked me a few months ago about cock, I would have drawn a firm line in the sand. "No way. That's something I'm not into!" But being on sissy websites, I seem to be inundated with it, and toying with this taboo has been interestingly exciting at times. But is it me? Not really. I'm still attracted to women, although the thought of sucking a cock makes for good sissy fantasy.
So this brings up the initial question: Am I a sissy? Do these things just make me a crossdresser with a vivid imagination? and the only answer I can come up with is, "I don't know, maybe."
No comments:
Post a Comment