Marriage and the Sissy: From Femdom to Wearing Panties

Since it was now out in the open, I felt a bit freer expressing myself to my wife.  I told her that I looked at porn, and this is what turned me on.  My wife rejected me, telling me that she was conservative, and didn't want to do all of these weird things.

When I brought up the memory of the strapon, she said she was testing me, to see if I'd do it, but that she really didn't want to do it.  I knew that it was a lie.

Over the course of over a year, I brought up several ideas that seemed sexy to me on the internet: chastity tubes, foot worship, goddess worship, spanking, etc.  She flatly rejected each one either telling me that it was weird or it did not interest her.

And anything regarding femdom, she said did not interest her because she wanted a man to be in charge.  Also, she said that she worked hard every day, and didn't want to come home and have to work at being a dominatrix.

"I just want to have a normal night when I come home.  I don't want to be your mommy, and spank you and tell you what to do."

I tried to convince her that I could make her life more relaxing if I served her, she still rejected it.

After constant efforts to bring some sort of sexual excitement into the bedroom, she finally got upset with my efforts and said, "Look, I don't care what you do on your own.  Do whatever you want with these things, but I'm not going to be a part of them."

It was a bit upsetting, but I took her at her word, and went off in my own direction.  I told her that I didn't want my fantasy to just be my own though.

In the meantime, things went on as usual, and our sex life was infrequent at best, maybe every other week.  Masturbating to fantasies on the internet, on my part, didn't help, and I again brought up the idea of a chastity tube as a way to control my desires, and to concentrate on her.

She rejected it, and I even bought one and tried to do it on my own, but it didn't work out.

One day, I was reading a femdom story where the dominatrix made the man wear panties and clean the floor.  It was pretty exciting, and brought back memories of my old hobby.

I played around with the idea for a while, and then one day, on impulse, pretended that my mistress tasked me with going to the store to buy panties and a bra like in one of the stories that I had been reading.

To my surprise, I went to the store, and went right to the intimates section and picked out a bra, panties, and a chemise.  An old lady who was shopping gave me a weird look and left.  Nervously I went up to the counter and waited.

Behind me, some workers were buying parts for their construction business, and when it was my turn, I was buying women's underwear.

"Oh, these are pretty," the lady tried to be nice and make small talk, which just made me more uncomfortable.

The worst part was over when I was finally leaving the store, and I came home with my prizes.

Excited, I put on the items, but to my surprise, they were only slightly titillating, not like I once remembered.  Still, I was able to use them to my satisfaction, and hid them in my closet. 

The next day, I pulled them out and used them again, but still, it seemed like the thrill was gone.  It wasn't as sexy as I remembered it.  When I went to put them back, I suddenly got the urge to throw them away.  I felt bad throwing away good money, but I didn't want my wife to find these items, thinking that I was either having an affair or that I had women's underwear.  Either way, it would be an uncomfortable conversation if she found them, so in the trash they went.

Wrapping them in a bag, I put them in the trash, and thought that I was done with this little adventure forever.